Chai Me

There are few things that my coffee shop has that are better than Starbucks, but their chai rocks!  Since discovering this the money I get from tips goes away a little faster.  My chai latte makes me feel at home.  Yes, I realize how crazy that sounds but its true.  Admit it, you know those drinks that just make you feel warm and fuzzy inside, content, and make you want to smile.  A slightly weird and simple joy in life, but a joy nonetheless.
I've always attempted to be intentional about recognizing those little joys in life. All in all I think I appreciate the things that I have, although I'm not always as vocal as I should be about it.  But lately I've been trying to be as purposeful about recognizing the ways that God has been repeatedly faithful in the way he has directed my life.  So I have begun journaling all the times in which God's plan has been better than mine.  I really wish I had done this sooner, but somehow it never seemed necessary.  I know that God's plan is better than mine.  I know that whatever changes is always for His purpose.  And yet, my daily thoughts and random freak outs don't always reflect that mind set.
Since I collected all these adorable journals, I have also began journaling about my fears.  Through the women's retreat, my small group, and some other random conversations I've begun to realize that I am plagued with fear.  Through taking a wise woman's advice and "playing out the fear to its end", I'm discovering that it all comes down to whether or not I truly trust whether God's plan is better than mine.  Sounds familiar right?
My hope is that I will begin to recognize the thought patterns that contradict what I know to be true: God's way is always better.